#iveyishome

Photo by Amber Holritz

 So where have we been. We have been with ivey for 15 weeks now - she is 16 weeks today. WOW time flies. I had always heard that with children but I never really got it. It is all still surreal to me. Still strange to hear myself called mom. Still wild to look at her and realize she is OURS!

Ivey is a perfectly healthy, happy girl. We are amazed every day by her strength and happy moments. She is smiling and cooing and "gabbing" up a storm.

Before I can go forward I need to start back where I dropped off on my last blog post. After we met Ivey - we went back to the hotel with our two fur babies in tow. We didn't know how long we would need to stay - all we knew is we were a family. We spent 9 LONG days in that hotel with two fur babies and a newborn. It was quite the adjustment. Ivey did great in the hotel - she was still in that newborn honeymoon phase - it was nice and quiet before the storm of home and all our visitors happened. We were lucky enough to have Rick and Susan of FAS and Amanda, Matt and Mills who told us about FAS - it was like we had family there. And luckily my mom, daddy bob and dad all made it over to birmingham to visit their new granddaughter. 

hard to believe she was ever this small

so thankful for these 4

love at first sight

Grammy and Pop Pop meet Ivey

Pap meets Ivey

I think the FUNNIEST story we have had to date is one late night Ivey was crying uncontrollably and we had fed her, changed her, burped her, etc WITH NO RELIEF. Ivey was crying, I was crying - Corey was pacing. Corey asked me to google inconsolable crying. To which I asked while trying to type. HOW DO YOU SPELL INCONSOLABLE?? This moment will be laughed at for years to come. We started getting the hang of it. At first I thought Corey was more maternal than me - he just had that knack. One morning I woke up and saw him strapping Ivey on, and putting leashes on Olive and Nellie and venturing out on a walk. I knew right then and there I was BLESSED. More than I could ever imagine. 

a moment I have always dreamed about

We finally got out of there - after finally getting clearance from Alabama to leave the state and from Tennessee to come back in. We were able to meet with the judge and go ahead and get the "pat on the head" so we won't have to come back October 23rd when Ivey's adoption is final. We started out on the road and said our goodbyes to our amazing agency, our sweet friends the Leaches and the beautiful town that Ivey will always call "home."

moncriefphotography.com/

We arrived home on June 21st to a crowd of friends and family. Our home was decorated and cleaned.  It honestly took my breath away. Thank goodness my sweet friend Brittany of Moncrief Photography took photos of the day because honestly it was like a blur. Here is the link to the blog from Moncrief Photography - and Here is the video of that wonderful day.

Then it was just us in our home. So thankful Corey is home since he is just in school for now. Granted he is still super busy but it is great truly having a partner in this. Thankful the fur babies took to Ivey - they love their little sister and vice versa. We had visitor, after visitor, after visitor. We were so grateful but we were still in the adjustment phase and some days were just HARD. Some days it was hard to put on a happy face. The first few months honestly were the reason I didn't want a "baby" and wanted an older kid. I didn't think I could do it, I was emotional and was sick of crying. I felt bad because Ivey was a GREAT baby - but I felt like I had lost myself. I missed my work, I missed time with my husband, I missed time alone. I did a lot of soul searching and reaching out to friends via phone, instagram and facebook and in person - it was so nice to hear others had gone through the exact same thing. People don't tell you about this part. I had NO idea how emotional I would be. I thought that was just a hormonal thing and well I didn't give birth. I thought I would just have happy tears not overwhelming almost sad tears. People keep saying it all gets better around 3-4 months and they were right.

Photo by Amber Holritz

Photo by Amber Holritz

Photo by Amber Holritz

Here we are at 16 weeks and we are getting true genuine smiles and giggles. It already has gone so fast. We already look back and almost forget the days in the hotel. I almost, almost forget about the first few weeks when I would cry nonstop. It is still hard don't get me wrong - I am still excited for the time when we truly will interact and play with Ivey. I already know I am a better mom when I get a break. Corey and I make sure each of us get alone time and make sure to still go on dates with each other. We want to remember where this family started and want to make sure we nurture us along with our girl. 

Photo by Amber Holritz

These first few months have been OVERWHELMING - we have been showered with love, gifts, meals, and prayers. Through it all we know we are blessed. I always thought people were crazy when they said it would all be worth the wait. I didn't want to hear it at the time - but today I know it is all true. All of this was to get to her. Ivey our gorgeous daughter who gives us a reason to smile everyday. She was made for us and to her birth mom we are FOREVER grateful for making a beautiful, healthy, happy girl. And to each of you thank you for loving our girl and us. Thanks for following along on our journey. God has blessed us. Our story is truly just beginning.......

Photo by Amber Holritz

Here is a wonderful blog post by Amber Holritz - most of the above photos are from Ivey's first photo shoot with Amber. 

Really and truly bringing Ivey home

To say the last 11 days have been a whirlwind is an understatement. Last Tuesday (after feeling like maybe our agency knew our birth mom and Ivey might be coming later this year) my mom and I went to buy buy baby to buy some Ivey essentials. We had a beautiful day - one I will never forget. My mom and I both said we felt like for the first time Ivey really was coming home soon. I had been texting with Susan at the agency all day and she kept wanting to know if i got home safely. When I let her know I had arrived home - we got the call. Susan asked if Corey was home and asked to be put on speaker phone. This was it. The call. Susan started reading a text from iveys birth mom that said she could come get Ivey "honey bee" (nicknamed by Susan after watching the secret life of bees in the hospital room). Susan then said the words we would never forget "I am holding your daughter, you can come get her" I thought i was going to pass out. Susan said we might want to get a good nights rest and head to Birmingham in the morning. We asked for photos and this was our first view of our 5 day old daughter.

Meet Ivey Mariposa Weldon

Ivey - named after her great, great grandmother

Mariposa - meaning butterfly in Spanish - named after our beautiful friend Laura who we lost unexpectedly almost 3 years ago. Laura left quite an impression on our life - and even gave me my 2 godchildren. We all see butterflies since she passed and we wanted our daughter to always know about her. 

Born 6/6/13 In the beautiful city of Birmingham, Alabama 

7 lbs 6.7 oz

20 and 3/4 inches long

After shuffling around the house trying to do some quick cleaning and oh yeah get some sleep we left Wednesday morning. Arriving in Birmingham with schnauzers in tow we are first greeting by our awesome friend Amanda (who found me on Instagram and told us about family adoption services- more on this special soul later) she filmed us walking in and meeting our daughter for the first time. We will have video and photos to share later. 

Laying eyes on Ivey for the first time erased the last 9 years. All of this wait was for her. She is the most beautiful thing we have ever seen. 

Here she is with her aunt Amanda 

Our amazing friend and half of the Rick and Susan team from family adoption services. Susan and Rick kept our beautiful girl in their home until she was ready for us. Susan even got to see Ivey born. I will write way more about these two soon!!

We just sat in amazement and watched our daughter who had been surrounded by love from the moment she was born. It all felt surreal.....

But she is ours. 

Will come back soon for the rest of the story. Feeling very blessed. Corey and I are so lucky. 

We love each of you. 

And many more photos to come. You might stop following me on Instagram and Facebook lol 

14 months

Today marks 14 months since we started this latest journey to Ivey. I want to say every month gets easier and easier but honesty it only gets tougher. We appreciate the constant love and prayers. 

13 months

 

Hard to believe we are on month 13 on our most recent wait to Bring Ivey Home. What's harder to believe is that it would be 16+ months if we are supposed to stay with Ethiopia. We are hoping and praying our domestic route will bring our girl home. Our new motto in life is "let's climb the mountains together" we have gotten through this with each other and all of you. Thank you for your continued support. 

April 18th, 1998

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April 18, 1998

15 years ago today my life changed. 15 years ago I made a promise, a promise to live.

For those of you who don’t know – I was in a house fire on UTC Campus at the Sigma Chi Fraternity House in Chattanooga, TN. I escaped the fire by jumping out of the top floor only to land on a sidewalk. I broke my back, both feet and burnt over half my body 3^rd degree. They said I would never walk again; I had 4 surgeries the first few days – skin graphs that now cover both of my arms and my entire back. Rods were put in my back that later would be covered in staff infection and be removed. Left foot – clean ankle break, right foot crushed and basically wired back together on the inside. I don’t sweat, I can’t cool myself off, I can’t be in the sun, I can’t push myself physically, my foot sometimes just likes to “go out” on me, I wake up with an aching back everyday, I have gained a lot of weight due to not being as active, I have lost a lot of my self esteem, I look in the mirror and see scars from head to toe, and I always wondered why it happened to me?

But you know…I am ALIVE to write this today. I lived, I fought, I stayed strong and pulled through. I walked again. . I kept my good attitude “most” of the 3 months I lived in the hospital with my mom. I left the hospital in crutches even though they told me I would be in a walker. I was and am completely supported by the BEST friends and family a girl could ask for. The most genuine man I know loves me unconditionally and I am fortunate to have been married to him 12 years this July. I have four fur children that bring smiles to my face on a daily basis. We are on an incredible journey to bring our daughter home. I have a business that continues to make my heart happy. I live in a beautiful city surrounded by friends and family.

I wake up thankful everyday that I was given another chance to live. God saved me that day for a reason and I plan to spend my entire LONG life discovering why.

To all the people in my life that day and the 15 years to follow – thank you. I couldn’t have done this without you. All of you are part of my journey. I love each of you and thank God for the difference you have made in my life.

I leave you with this….remember to tell the people you love you LOVE them! We are reminded EVERY DAY that this could be our last day on earth. Thank God you woke up today. Thank God you were given another day to live. Enjoy it. Make the best of it. Don’t dwell on the bad stuff – there is ALWAYS good! Thank God for your blessings every night. Make a promise to live. I have kept my promise and will keep living my life one day at a time!

With my love and appreciation,

Tobi

1 year

 Well I would say time flies, but honestly it feel like forever. This is 1 year this go around. 8 years before this time. I can't believe it has been a year since we were officially approved for Ethiopia. Since then the wait has gone up 20+ months which lead us to add in domestic. This was a hard decision to make since we have had 4 domestic adoptions fall through. We were scared but have been blessed with an AMAZING domestic adoption agency. We feel very hopeful with Family Adoption Services - with this agency we are truly a part of a family.

We have more decisions to make - it is almost time to do a homestudy update and new fingerprints for international adoption and what is scary is we probably will have to do it again before we get a referral. This is a huge decision to make. Do we stay in line for Ethiopia also and hope for both? Or do we back out of Ethiopia and stay with just domestic. Definitely decisions we never thought we would be faced with.

Everyone says it - it will all be worth it. And we know in our hearts it will be. Ivey is already the most loved little girl in the world. She will be surrounded by friends, family, prayers, love and support. She will have the MOST amazing story to share. We will be the lucky ones - we can't wait for our family to grow.

I have said it over and over and over - but thank you. To each of you for all the love and support you give us. We have grown so much over this journey and are humbled by all the blessings we have been given. We love each of you and thank you for being a part of Ivey's story.

11 months

This is absolutely perfect for our wait. We know that all of this is happening for a reason - we may have days we don't believe....but we always come around to knowing that our story will include Ivey and she will come when it is time. Until then we pray, wait and hope - thanks for being with us on the journey.

10 months Waiting

10 Months - this is a hard one because when we started this Ethiopian journey we were told our wait would be 8-10 months. So we thought by this time we would have a referral. We thought we would have seen our daughters face. We thought we would have held her. That is just hard to think about...the what ifs, the would haves.....

Looking back, our first email to an adoption lawyer was in 2004. 9 years ago. 9 years of growth, heartache, love, support, money lost, money raised, moves, new jobs, 5 adoptions failed, new friends, new babies in the family, godchildren, death, new fur babies, new jobs, a college degree, new business ventures and more and more and more. We are blessed, we know that but sometimes it is just hard. Sometimes I just want to scream or cry and sometimes honestly I do. Corey is lucky (lol) that he has school to keep him busy. I just stitch and stitch and stitch. I told Corey tonight if I didn't have my work I think I would go crazy. I have pity parties - and for that friends I thank you for listening to me! 

This past weekend I was blessed to go to Created For Care (I will write more about that soon) in Atlanta and met some amazing new adoption friends and came away feeling very positive, blessed and reminded again that we are exactly where we need to be. This may be a horribly long journey but we know we are suppose to adopt and WE KNOW our daughter is out there. Ivey is already so loved and has SO many people waiting for her to come home. Isn't that amazing? This girl who may or may not even exist yet has a fan club? She is going to be showered with love, prayers, hugs and kisses and We can't WAIT to introduce her to each of you.

So until she is home we will wait and pray and hope. We need our friends and family. We couldn't do this without you guys. Every day we are reminded how blessed we are to be surround by friends and family on this journey. Corey and I have grown so much throughout this journey and through it all we have just gotten stronger. Every time we have had a heartache Corey reminds me that through it all he and I, and our relationship is the basis of this whole adventure. None of this would be possible without us. We are blessed. God is SO good to us. 

Even with the hard stuff.....we know God has a plan. 

So thank you to each of you for all you do for us. 

with love and thanks,

Tobi & Corey

9 Months down

Today December 30th we have officially been waiting (this go around) to Bring Ivey Home.  Hard to believe I could have carried her in this time. These are all the feelings I have had over the last 9 months. We thank each of your for your constant prayers, love and support!!! This girl is already so loved. We can't wait to be her mom and dad!

8 months

8 months ago today we started this most recent journey to #bringiveyhome. 

When we started 8 months ago the wait time was 8-10 months so this day is bittersweet because she could almost have been home. Since then the wait has gone up to 29-31 months. 

Sounds horribly long... In the meantime we are putting our hearts into domestic and seeing if that gets our girl home faster. Thanks for the continued love, support, prayers and donations. 

We love each of you.

7 Months!

Today marks 7 months since we have been waiting for our daughter. The months don't seem to go by any faster but we have hope knowing that every month that passes is one month closer to our girl. Thanks for all the wishes, dreams, love, support, prayers and donations - I say it every day but we really couldn't do this without you!!!

6 months and a new announcement

Today marks six months of waiting for Ivey.

 In 6 months a lot has happened with the journey. The wait time has gone up from 8-10 months to our most recent time increase of 29-31 months. This is simply heartbreaking. And the part that worries us the most is it could just keep going up. 

How long are we willing to wait? When will we give up? Will we give up? What are our options?

Let’s talk options:

*There are some new countries we could try – but our fear in this is those countries are so new and honestly they could close anytime.

 *We could switch agencies – go to an agency with less adoptive parents on the list which would equal less of a wait – the problem with this is we would basically have to START over – all the paperwork and the cost….and we would lose what we have already invested.

*Throw domestic back in the mix – the problem with this is we have gone down this road and it broke our hearts 4 times over. So why would we try that again?

So what did we choose you ask?

We decided to add Domestic adoption back in the mix. Are we crazy? Yes! Do we want our daughter to come home? Yes! Will we do whatever we can to get her home? Yes! I met with our agency last week and she brought up domestic and how we would “show” really well to a birth mother. I just listened and at first thought we are so not doing that again.  I came home and told Corey totally thinking he would say NO, but he surprised me with “let’s do this.” New adventure here we come!

So our next step on this new part of our adventure is meet with our agency on Wednesday. We will discuss our profile that will be shown to birth mothers. This is something we have never done before – all our past domestic birth mothers have been found from friends or friends of friends. This will be a brand new journey. We will now be chosen by a birth mother. Our potential birth mother will have come to the agency in hopes of giving her child a better life than the life she can give them. This still isn’t a guarantee but we feel like it is the better way to go. This may or may not happen before we would get a referral from Ethiopia. We can stay on both lists and no we don’t know what we will do if one happens before the other. These are all things we will decide on when the time comes. We are going to ask for a girl – as of right now we are choosing African American or mixed for their race.  We are scared, hopeful, excited, worried, etc. This is a HUGE step for us. So please wish us luck and send prayers our way.

This journey has shown us just how loved we are and how many people we have that support us. I know we could NOT do this without each of you. The texts, the happies, the phone calls, the cards, the instagram love, the donations….we are just blessed beyond measure.  Some of you have asked how Corey and I as a couple are doing. We are great – honestly no matter what has happened, with every adoption that has fallen through Corey reminds me that what matters in this is HE AND I and how we deal with it together as a couple. We have become stronger throughout this journey and are both so excited to be parents.  We are both heartbroken and angry at this last set back but we know all of this will one day be Ivey’s story. We will be able to tell her about the long journey to her, the love of our lives.

With love and gratitude,

Tobi & Corey

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5 Months Down

5 Months down! So far the wait is going fast - lets hope and pray it continues. I (Tobi) thought it was appropriate to mark 5 months with a little Ivey Handcrafted since I am working non stop for my show next weekend! Thanks for all the continued support!!! We love ya'll!!!

4 months down

Today marks 4 months waiting to bring our daughter home. Feels wonderful to be another month closer to having Ivey home with us! We are so grateful to our friends and family for the love and support you have all given to us. We couldn't go on this journey without you.

3 months down

We have now been waiting 3 months to Bring Ivey Home! This is my beautiful niece Lucy showing how excited she is that we have been waiting 3 months to bring her cousin home!

2 months waiting

We have officially been waiting 2 months! 

We still have a long road, but we are 2 months closer to Ivey!

Raising Ivey

On March 17th we had an AWESOME fundraiser. We thought it was appropriate to show Raising Arizona. It was donation based, and we sold snacks (candy, popcorn and yummy treats made by friends and family). I also had some Ivey Handcrafted items ready to be sold. In total we raised over $1,000. IT was AMAZING. What a fun night, around 40 of our closest friends and family came out in support of us and helped make our dreams continue to come true. Here are a few photos from the night taken by my dear friends Brittany (moncrief photography) and Meghan (soli photography). The ladies of Homespun Parties and Events allowed us to hold the event in their beautiful shop/studio. We are blessed, there is no better way to put it!

The beautiful location

Ivey's Aunt Bunny

Corey thanking the crowd

Corey and I with Ivey's Uncle and Aunt (tobi's brother and sister in law)

The Soon to be parents

myself and our beautiful friend Brittany who was gracious enough to take photos :)
Our sweet friend and photographer Meghan

Tobi & Stacy (sister in law and Ivey's aunt)

girlfriends

my nurse Steve from when I was in the burn unit. This was so special to me that he came to support us. He was a HUGE part of my recovery.

myself and the beautiful hostesss Ayesha and Kelly - lucky to call these girls my friends

We are officially Paper Pregnant!!!

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As of March 30th we are officially waiting.

It is so hard to get too excited we have a really long wait ahead of us. The wait time as of March 16th has changed to 18-24 months. This means more than likely our little girl isn't born yet, like we had thought. This means we have 2 years before seeing our little girl. This means there are two more mother's day and father's days that we aren't a mom and dad. This means 2 more Christmas's, New Years, Thanksgivings, Halloween's, etc, etc without our girl.

But the positive is hopefully in 2 years we will meet our girl and all of this hoping, wishing, praying and dreaming will all come true. Our heart is in Ethiopia and we can't wait to go get Ivey. She is already so loved by all these amazing people we have surrounding us. I always knew we had great support, but this time around it just keeps overwhelming us with how many people we have on our side. We thank each of you for the support, prayers, donations, kind thoughts, hugs, positive reinforcement, friendship and love. We couldn't do this without you. The next 2 years is going to be the toughest because we know our girl is out there we just can't get to her. So continue to keep us in your thoughts and prayers. Pray for Ivey and her birth mother - they need us. Pray the wait times decrease. We love you and will forever be indebted to you. .

We will keep you posted with any news we have, but for now we wait....won't you wait along with us?